SCENARIO: >>Desperately trying to eat healthy. Boredom-driven hunger incoming. I am dramatically sprawled on the couch, therapy patient style, calling to him in the kitchen.<<

​

Me: "Baby?"

Adam: "Lay it on me, big mama."

:::pause:::

Me: "You just called me fat."

Adam: "Lay it on me, little lady."

:::pause:::

Me: "You just called me immature."

:::pause:::

Adam: "Lay it on me, appropriate-sized attractive person."

:::pause::::

Me: "That's nice. Thank you."

Adam: "So? C'mon. Tell me. Before I stop listening."

Me: "No. I can't. You won't understand me. No one will. Ever. You don't know me."

Adam: "Sure I do. I know you lots. So?"

Me: :::sigh::: "Ok."

:::raise head to peek up over back of the couch:::

Me: "I want sliders." :::collapse:::

Adam: "Ok. Want me to go to Vons and grab White Castles?"

:::internal conflict:::

Me: "I completely and utterly do not know the answer to that question. Yes. No! ......NO."

Adam: "K. Well,.... I'm gonna go lie down now. So call me in 10 minutes when you've changed your mind and decide that you want me to go." :::kiss:::

 

(He's right. He does know me.)
(I'm on minute 7. And I hate my life.)

*Extended version: click here to see minute 16